Port Vale 1 Oxford 2 : 12 March 2011

I caught the 10:20 from Euston, arrived at Stoke for 11:48, and headed off to look for the bus to Burslem as I'd taken advantage of the £3 plus-bus offer. I'd scribbled down the directions from football ground guide, and I'm not sure whether I got them right, but ended up across the motorway on a dilapidated row of terrace houses, waiting for I thought the 21 or 21A. Even though it was a one-way street, the first bus I got on was going to the other end of the route, so at twenty past twelve a bus finally arrived going to Burslem. Simple I thought, take the left onto the motorway and the ground is apparently only 2 miles away. Except this bus went into the centre of Stoke round the one-way-system, then stopped at the bus station for 10 minutes. After picking up several old ladies who had that jumble sale whiff about them, we finally started off back round the one-way system, before heading off for a tour of the local retail park, "NO CAR CRUISES ALLOWED" (by high court order).

I finally arrived at Burslem around 1pm, to see police outside nearly every pub. After the advice to find the Bulls Head, I ventured in to find a lot of Oxford fans, and I thought perhaps a Northern section sporting very old-school Black and Yellow scarfs. It turned out they were Vale fans protesting at the current ownership. The Bulls Head was a Titanic Brewery pub, and I worked my way through Steerage, Anchor, and Iceberg (£7.50 for a round of three decent real ales wasn't bad). The rest of the group had been tempted by the barbecue burgers in the beer garden, but then the chef produced huge farmhouse banger sausages, and after one of us had tried it, the rest all went back for a taste, and at £1.75 it makes the van catering outside the Kasstad look very low rate. (Apologies to Boris, but I don't think there was a veggie option, unless you include onions and ketchup in a roll).

Onto Vale Park: I've never been there before, but I have heard it described as the 'Wembley of the North'. Pre-match I went round to the club-shop through hordes of Vale fans to pick up a badge, but they had sold out of programmes. The club shop was spacious with a good range of stock.

The ground itself is the widest football pitch I have possibly seen, and there are a good five yards spare grass on each touchline. Us away fans were squeezed in to the middle of a stand behind one goal, the left and right (and even the front four rows) sectioned off by netting. A big electronic scoreboard was hung above us behind the goal, but apart from a small clock in the middle of the stand to our right we didn't have many clues to match or league updates. The rest of Vale Park is a good sized 4-stand ground. To our left was a one-level stand where the vocal home fans all congregated to the left hand corner at the start of the first half. This seemed bizarre at the time, as there is a decent stand behind the goal at the opposite end to the away fans . Between these two was a 'fill in the corners' stand, and again on the other side. To our right was the main stand, which had a double level of executive boxes, and to our right one block of concrete steps presumably ready for more seating if they jump a few divisions. The stewards inside the ground didn't seem too concerned about standing at the back and middle behind the goal. 

Pre-match, Vale's music included Let Me Entertain You (Robbie Williams), who is apparently a Vale fan and shareholder.

The game: For such a wide pitch, Wilder had done his homework and really mixed the team up to give options from wide. With Tonkin suspended, we went for a back four of Kinni, Wright, Worley and Purkiss. I'm no good at formations, but it was Payne, Clist, McLaren in midfield, with Potter and Hackney on the wings, and Midson to run up front. 

Ex Yellow Lewis Haldane is thankfully recovered from his Summer leg infection. We also encountered the giant defender Exodus Geohaghon, one time opponent at Kettering, but also and England C colleague at the Kassam in the same side as James Constable. Geohaghon followed his Kettering manager Mark Cooper to Peterborough, but after Cooper left he fell out of favour and has been on loan to several clubs.

Within the first five minutes one of our players absolutely clattered into their attacker up on the far right of the pitch. The Ref luckily pulled out a yellow, but it could have been red on another day.

Jack Midson had a couple of early one on ones, but just couldn't get his shots on target. Harry Worley had a great game, heading the lobbed floaty kicks away with ease. Jake Wright was solid as usual. Stevie Kinniburgh had less to do it seemed, or perhaps it was just that there was less action on that side, or he just did his job with no clangers to write about.

The penalty decision to Port Vale was pretty easy for the ref, although two players crashing into each other back-to-back could have been waved away. Ryan Clarke went the right way and blocked the shot, but unfortunately the rebound went fortuitiously back to the penalty taker who finished off.

Before the second half finished, Potter's run into the oppo penalty area and shot saw a good save from their goalie, but he parried up into the air, and Jack Midson was poacher to knock in.

The play for us was great when we got it right, nice passing football, spreading out to the wings, or passing into the middle to try and attack from there.

Onto the second half: The Vale fans to our near left didn't reappear, until we realised they had the cunning plan of simply walking to the other end of the stand so they were near the goal they were attacking {Isn't this a bit like Tonbridge Angels and Eastbourne Borough?}. Luckily the crowds of 6,000 mean there is plenty of space, and the far corners of each stand probably aren't very popular. Behind the goal seems better to me, although I did wonder if Vale's ground was so square they could move the pitch 90 degrees.

We played more of the same second half, but on occasion we were attacking and end up losing the ball back in our own area. At least with the pitch so wide, we didn't see Clarke kicking into touch as is usual the last few games.

Suited Jim Gannon has allegedly lost the respect of the Vale players from pub talk earlier, and his frantic gesturing seemed at odds with Wilder.  Wilder recently seems to have decided for the suit and Wenger puffa jacket at away games, whilst still in training gear at home.  

Worley continued his renaissance as the new Creighton, by scoring from I think a corner lobbed into the box around the 70 minutes mark? From then on, it seemed we went to defend with 10 behind the ball, or any attacks got weasled out into the corner. We just about bored the game into submission and finally the ref blew after four minutes of extra time.

There was heavy police presence outside, a combination of the home fans protests, and the likelihood of trouble between United and Vale fans. One man went running past me in the car park towards the low wall at the end of the car park where the Vale fans were looking over and shouting, and next time I looked he was being held by the police in a half-nelson on the ground with his face pressed into the floor.

After one of us finally made it round to the club shop for programmes, we were considering heading back to the Bull's Head as our train back wasn't until nearly 7pm. However, as the five of us walked into Burslem, there was a group of about 30 Vale fans (none in colours of course) about 100 yards behind, and three youths in Adidas Gazelles came jogging past and on into the town centre. Despite the Bull's Head being 'away friendly', at this point we decided a taxi back to Stoke was the safe option.

Lincoln 3 Oxford 1

After the original game back in December 2010 was postponed for the snow, I lost out on my train fare as apparently advance tickets are only refundable if the train is delayed, so £40 down the drain before I even started.   Following the daytime trek by car to Morecambe on mostly motorways, there was no way I was doing a trip to Lincoln on a weeknight, so opted for a train and overnight stay.   As this was a leisure trip on my own, I chose to go first class, which was around £80 for the return trip.  Considering a day-time trip to Manchester costs around that, I thought this was a worthwhile treat. 

Unfortunately this game was on the first of the month, which is one of my busiest work days.  I managed to escape the office at 11:45, caught the 12:30 Guildford-Waterloo, and after a cross-London transfer I left King's Cross for the East Coast Line up to Newark North Gate.  The East Coast trains are possibly the old InterCity 125s, or at least they look that dated.  Still, my first class table seat was spacious and I was offered plentiful tea and coffee or water.  The other passengers hoping for the cooked meals were disappointed to find that was only available on different trains, and had to get by on the standard class toasted sandwiches.  From Newark, there was a chugger one carriage train to Lincoln which took around 40 minutes. 

The train circled into the city around the University campus, before finally arriving in the centre.  I had never been to Lincoln before, but had hoped to spot the cathedral as the renowned landmark from miles away.  The local buildings shielded it from view, and I headed up into the Old Town towards my hotel, still with no views.  The walk got steeper and steeper.  I found myself on the cunningly named "steep hill", and after twenty minutes of huff and puff finally got to the top by the castle and cathedral.  I spotted a Yellow couple and said hello, and they had been to the top of the castle but advised against climbing.  With sweat rings on my shirt, I decided to check in to the hotel and have a cool down.  My hotel was literally built into the ancient walls of the city, and I went for a short walk around the top end of the city to take some pictures of the cathedral and castle. 

What perhaps shocked me most was the Big Issue sellers and beggars based up by the Cathedral, who were quite clearly addicts from their faces and bloodshot eyes.  For the 'posh' end of town I was surprised, but apparently the people who visit cathedrals are most likely to give to 'good causes'. 

I decided to dine at the hotel Grille, which was advertised as recommended to pre-book.  Just guessing, but the speed with which they dished out my 'hot smoked salmon steak' starter from the specials board, and the pork belly main course made me suspect the food was pre-cooked, deep frozen and finished off in the kitchen. 

Later I wandered downhill to the town centre, finally spotting Womble through the Wetherspoons window, and joined his group for a pint.   Down town looked a lot more like the Cowley Road, with a Chinese takeaway called 'Legal Food', which made me wonder quite what the alternative was .  We then went on to the ground, and I took my usual detour to the club shop for a club badge. 

We were placed to the top of one corner of a stand along the pitch, perhaps similar to what away fans experience at the Kasstad.  To our left were some vocal home fans up against the segregation netting.  In the equivalent of our East Stand were a hardcore of young fans who stood all game, banged their drum, and jumped around too.  To our right was a fairly unused Executive Stand, although Oxford fans had taken one box.  Opposite was the main one tiered stand.

So, onto the game. This was a bizarre match where Lincoln went one-up, and then we equalised after their goalie somehow stopped a shot and whilst prone on the ground let the ball slither from his grasp for us to equalise.  The stewards kept their beady eyes on us throughout which was quite disconcerting.  In the second half we started strongly, but then it all went wrong with two comical own goals, leaving Lincoln the deserved 3-1 winners. 

I took the lazy option of a taxi back to the top of town, had a couple of glasses of wine in the hotel bar before retiring to bed.  In the morning I opted for the poached eggs and hollandaise sauce.  Good, but not as good as at Lake Louise. 

The morning walk to the station was interrupted by a search for a book shop, which the Yellows I had seen the afternoon before promised me had a Lincoln-Oxford programme from the '70s.  I found the shop, was taking details to let my programme collectors know as the shop wasn't due to open until 11, when the owner started opening up. He let me in early, charged me 99p for the programme, and I headed on back to the town centre and station.  At only quarter past nine the local addicts were congregating on a bench over the canal / river for their morning lagers. 

9:30 saw a two carriage train head to Newark Castle, which was around 25 minutes walk to North Gate.  Newark is a quite well preserved town with obviously a castle, but also converted warehouses and redbrick building.  I finally got home around 1pm, and then back to work to catch up.